Favo Novel
Chapter 71
71 Finding Out More (Winona)
Having these kids for a full day, I'm still very nervous about it. They aren't saying much and I don't want to press them on the details of their mother. Sarah basically says nothing and Bobby is protective of her, and isn't offering any information either.
Perhaps I'll try asking again later. I mean, these kids are my half-siblings, I'm not sure what to do with them. Abby has been fine about having them here, but four-year-olds are fine about most things, I guess. They talk to Abby, I heard them chattering and laughing with her. So I know they can communicate.
I wonder if their life has been like mine was. Cold, hungry and punished most of the time. Lonely. Tears *swell in my eyes. I'm not letting that bastard take over my life again. I know he'll be back when the money is gone.
I need to be ready and to try and get these kids to a safer home environment. I don't want him in my home. I do feel better now I know I have security watching.
Otherwise, I'd be a complete mess. My nerves are shot at this stage. Wondering what's going to happen. next. Worrying over who knows where we live and told him.
Why? Why is he here?
I'm shaking and the cold sweats have started again. I've been hiding my level of anxiety from Jayden. But every time I hear a sudden noise, or catch a glimpse of something, I almost go into panic mode. I can't even think about leaving my house at this stage. This morning Abby and I did some coloring and I helped her with some counting. She's getting very
very good. counting almost to twenty now. Sarah sat with us but she didn't join in. She seemed to be taking it all in though.
I wonder how much school they've seen. Maybe none.
Abby is thriving and honestly, you wouldn't even know she'd been in hospital fighting for her life not so long ago. Except, I do know. I remember every second of fear and despair that ripped through me at the
time.
The hopelessness I felt thinking about how it might be if I lost her. How nothing else in my life means anything without Abby. I used to think that person was Jayden and it was. Through school, college, I'd have done anything for him probably. But the world was different through the lens of youth.
Since Abby has been conceived, I began to see the world differently. That every sacrifice I ever would make would be for Abby, not for Jayden and I.
I was focused on myself and what I wanted from life. Namely getting away from and staying away from my parents. I'd achieved that. I really hit the jackpot with Anne as a foster parent. That changed me and my outlook about myself.
I never lost the urgency to do well at college and study hard. Being able to provide an income for myself was the most important issue to me. That gave me independence for life. I'd never have to rely on anyone
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71 Finding Out More
else.
Of course, Jayden's family was stupidly rich. I'd never want for a thing if I was with him.
But, that was not how I needed my life to be. It was bad enough being so emotionally dependent on him back then. We rely on each other. I often think about how he must have felt when he was trying to regain what his life was after the accident.
It must have been so frustrating for him. He's lashed out with pure anger towards me. I wasn't expecting that. All I knew was I'd lost a whole year of life, and I didn't want to lose anymore. I'd come back to find Jayden and be with him. Judy and Ashlyn made damn sure that wasn't happening.
Abby is going for a nap and I'm going out to the garden. I don't want to leave the kids alone in there, so I 'invite them to join me. They've both showered last night and I washed and dried their clothes quickly, so they are looking and smelling fresh. Jayden had grabbed some pyjamas for them from the store. I think I should take them shopping for some more clothes. I'm not sure. So today, I will try and get some information out of them.
"Hey, Bobby, Sarah, let's go out the back. I have some gardening to do, maybe you can help while Abby sleeps.
They both look at me expressionless.
"Come on, it'll be fun. I have some plants to go in and I want to make a swing for Abby off the big tree."
Bobby shrugs, "Okay." He grabs Sarah's hand, and they head to the back door.
"Okay. Great."
I get my gardening gloves on and pull on my short rubber boots. "I know you two don't have gardening shoes but it isn't too muddy out here. The days have been warm and dry lately, haven't they?" Bobby shrugs. Sarah says nothing.
I picked up the container of flower seedlings. "These are Californian Poppies. The state flower of California. Have you heard of them before?"
Sarah shakes her head.
Bobby says, "do these have the orange and yellow flowers?"
"They do, yes."
"There's a lot around this city."
"There sure is. They really brighten the place up. Do you have flowers around the city you come from?"
He shrugs.
"I'm just trying to help you and your sister, Bobby. If I can find some other family to help you out."
He just looks at me.
"What about your mother? Do you know where she is?"
71 Finding Out More
"Nope. She left us."
"But maybe I can get you back to her. Without him. I know what it's like to live with him. You don't have to stay there like that."
I push a plant into the dirt. "So you just make a little hole and then press down like this, Sarah. Would you like to do the next one?" She nods. I hand her the seedling I've separated out.
"Would you like to get away from him, Bobby. Be honest with me so I can help."
"I guess."
T
"What's your mother's name? Where did you live with her. Maybe I can find her and we can get someone to go see her." "Sarah is her name."
"I see. And her last name?"
Bobby hesitates.
"I promise, I will do everything I can to keep you safe."
"Moore."
"So is that your and your sister's last name too?"
He nods.
So, they don't have my father's last name.
"What about school?"
"We haven't been since Mom left us."
"Okay. Tell me which school you went to."
"Maplewood High."
My heart beats fast. That is my old school. Before I went with Anne. They still live in the same area as we did.
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