Chapter 68
Claire’s POV
What a reunion. And what a morning after. Ho boy; he was all over me, waking me up with his tongue just like that first morning. What a way to wake up! I had a fleeting thought about the fact that he’d eventually want me to reciprocate.
After what had happened with that guy in Mexico, could I ever reciprocate with Azriel or anyone for that matter?
I didn’t even know the guy’s name. I didn’t want to know. I wanted to forget. There was so much I wanted to forget but so much I didn’t think I could ever put out of my mind completely.
“Baby?” he was looking up at me.
I hadn’t realized it but I was crying while he was doing that to me. He settled beside me and pulled me to his chest.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
“Sorry,” I said softly and wiped my eyes with my fingertips.
“What?” he gave me a squeeze.
“So much,” I whispered into his chest.
“Tell me,” he kissed my forehead.
I was surprised that he had stopped. I was surprised that he was looking at me with so much tenderness.
“It’s a lot to get into five seconds after waking up.”
And I don’t know if I can even say these things to you.
“Talk. Start somewhere.”
“I’m still a bit shell shocked, I guess, after what happened. After everything,” I swept my hand back and forth in front of me.
“Understandable,” he said.
“I’m overwhelmed and I want, need, answers. Answers about…… I just need to know what’ll happen next. With my dad, with my life. With… you.”
I still couldn’t face the reality that my own father had ratted me out so I wasn’t able to escape…… all he cared about was keeping him and his ‘family’ safe. I was nothing to him. I thought that the realization of it would hurt me bad but it didn’t…… I guess I’d known all along how fargone my father had really been in caring for me.
“Uh huh.”
“And you. I want to ask you what happened in Mexico but I don’t. I don’t know if you want to talk about it or if I even want to know. It feels like you went to hell and back.”
He nodded, “I did.”
“My head is just full.” And I didn’t know how I felt about him, about us but I didn’t know how to articulate that.
He nodded again, “I’m gonna go get us some coffee, okay? But first I need to do something?”
“What?”
“Need to f**k you, baby.” His words sounded harsh but then his mouth turned up in the beginnings of a smile.
I laughed, “Romance is officially dead.”
He smiled at me and then raised his brows, “Yeah, isn’t it? For instance, I’ll try not to let it ding my ego too much that my going down on you just drove you to tears. Just let me, like super-fast, if you don’t mind? I promise not to be super-fast too often but this time, I think I just need to…” he pushed his fist forward in the air.
I laughed harder. He was being so playful. His eyes were filled with light. He looked totally adorable. He was beautiful. Before I knew what I was doing I’d reached to put my palm on his cheek. He needed a shave.
He pounced on top of me, his eyes full of amusement.
“Feel free,” I said, “Since you’re here anyway.” I scrubbed my fingers along the stubble at his jaw.
“Are you giving me permission?” he asked, his eyes darkening and face turning serious. Very serious. I took a deep breath. “I don’t need permission to take what’s mine, do I?” He kissed the palm of my hand and then ran a finger from my elbow up to my throat and then he put his hand over my throat. I swallowed against the space between his thumb and index finger.
“I’m all about control but baby, I don’t just want it. I need it,” he said, and then waited, hand looser on my throat.
I nodded slightly, not sure how to process how I felt.
“I feel out of control right now,” he said, studying me. He had pain in his eyes.Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org exclusive © material.
I swallowed hard and then the silence between us was almost deafening, “Then take it,” I whispered and he studied my face for a minute.
Then he let go of my throat and kissed me hard and then whispered, “You’re perfect,” then he was inside of me. A few thrusts in and he started to pound harder and faster and I just closed my eyes and absorbed the feel of him. It was exquisite. I let go, let go of emotions, inhibitions, I just let him take what he wanted and it felt so…so freeing.
He pulled out, flipped me over onto my side and pounded into me from behind and then he grabbed my throat again and held it. He didn’t hurt my throat, he didn’t squeeze, but it was possessive. I started to feel that quickening and then he slowed, culling it. I grabbed the headboard with both hands and held on.
“Do you want to come?” he whispered in my ear softly, tickling me.