Brothers of Paradise Series

“Me too, baby.”

“Kiss me again.”

I do. Her lips are warm against mine, her taste sweet. I feel like I’m drowning and flying at once, afraid to touch her because of my own shame and guilt.

Lily leans back. “You’re being too careful.”

I shake my head at her. “Lie down, Lils. Do you need another pill?”

“No. They make my head a bit fuzzy.”

I frown at the bottle of painkillers. “Is that normal?”

“Yes, you worrier, the doctor said that would happen.” She burrows down in her covers and I hand her the book she’s been reading. “Here I am, in bed and it’s not even eight p. m.”

I roll my eyes at her. “You’re healing.”

“My new hobby. Come closer, Hay.”

I bend down obediently and close my eyes as Lily runs a hand over my cheek. Her fingers feel cool against my skin. “We’re in this together, Hayden. Aren’t we?”

I nod, feeling like my heart might break from the war between guilt and desire wagering inside it. “Yes, we are.”

I close the door softly behind me and head down the stairs. I’ve nearly reached the kitchen door when Michael Marchand stops me with a single nod of his head. He has his hands in his pockets, the thick hair brushed back. I’ve always tried to stay out of his way-the business tycoon of Paradise Shores-but I can’t hide anymore.

“We need to talk, Hayden.”

The small, faint trace of hope I’ve harbored sinks like a stone. Of course we need to talk. I can imagine what he’s going to say, the words that will cut like knives. The accusations. The betrayal of trust. The crashed car. The time has come.

“All right.”

“I have great respect for your uncle,” he says quietly. “He’s been a fine employee all these years.”

Unease makes my stomach flip. Where is he going with this?

“I’ve always been happy to pay for your schooling. You’ve been a good friend to my boys, too. Don’t think I haven’t noticed that.” He pauses, waiting for my response. It’s late and it’s summer, but he’s still in a button-down and slacks. I’ve never seen him in a T-shirt.

“Thank you,” I say lamely.

He nods, like I’ve said the right thing. “Now, I’m going to talk to you man to man, because you’re grown. The same way I talk to my sons.” His voice turns glacial. “I’m not going to insult us both by asking why you were driving my car in the middle of the night with my daughter in it. I’ve got eyes of my own, as does my wife.”

I want to sink through the floor. “Yes.”

“Lily’s always been a bit… wild. I’m not surprised that she’s drawn to you. But I am surprised that you gave in. You know it’s not in your best interest.”

“Yes.” My voice sounds weak to my own ears. I find myself agreeing with everything he’s saying.

“And it’s definitely not in Lily’s. My daughter nearly died two weeks ago, partly because of you.” He holds up a hand, as if to stop me from protesting. I wasn’t about to. “Now, I know the truck was in your lane. The police have confirmed that. But she shouldn’t have been out there in the first place.”

“I know,” I say again.

“You know where I’m going, I’m sure. You’ve figured it out yourself.” He pauses, face impassive. “You’re not welcome here anymore. Not around my daughter, and not in my house. It’s time for you to go, son.”

The pain laces through me at the words. I’ve always known this isn’t home, not really. A place where you’re staying thanks to someone else’s mercy can never truly be home. But for years, it had been as close to one as I’d ever come.

I can’t argue with him. There’s no point, no point at all. Because he’s right. I hurt her, and I don’t deserve her. And if I stay, she’ll have to fight with her parents over this. Over me.

“I see.”

“Now, don’t look sullen. We can find someplace for you to go, I’m sure. It’ll be a quiet thing between the two of us. Do you need college tuition? There are good schools out West. I could make some calls. How does one of the UCs sound?”Upstodatee from Novel(D)ra/m/a.O(r)g

I’d rather kill myself than accept more charity from him. “No, thank you.”

“Don’t turn down a good opportunity because of pride, son. I’d let you pay me back.”

“No,” I grind out.

“Very well. Make your arrangements soon, then.” He takes a step forward and shakes my hand. “Don’t be a stranger to your uncle. Make something of yourself.”

“I will.”

“Do you need money for bus fare? Plane tickets?”

“No,” I say. “Thanks.”

He pauses for a second. His eyes are clinical, like we’ve just signed a business deal. “It’s nothing personal, Hayden. It’s just better this way.”

“Yes, sir.”

I walk back to the beach house. I pack a bag with my clothes and my belongings. I write a note for Gary, too short by far to encompass all that he’s been for me. I promise to call as soon as I can.

I write a letter to Lily and slip it into the Marchand mailbox.

Then I grab the pamphlets Mrs. Abrams gave me about enlisting and military colleges and board the first Greyhound out of Paradise Shores. Because Mr. Marchand had really only told me what I already knew. It’s time for me to go.

It’s better this way.

Lily

The present

I try to focus on the blueprints in front of me. Stop thinking about Hayden. But it’s very, very difficult. My mind keeps wandering to the past weekend, to the greenhouse and the conversation we’d had the day after.

We’d slept together again-and not in the romantic, soft way. It had been passionate and intense and everything I’d ever wanted.

And now… now he wants to give dating a chance. Tonight, after work, I’ll head to his house for dinner. His idea.

Maybe I was being stupid, agreeing to the prospect of dating him. I knew I risked getting hurt again. I didn’t want that. But for years, I’d lived carefully and quietly, been the good girl at every turn, and that got old, too.